My wife and I were really excited to see Nonstop because it was the latest from Liam Neeson, the formerly drippy actor who in the last few years has become the greatest and most likable ass-kicking action hero in the history of cinema. It also featured Julianne Moore, who late in her career is returning to her weird, edgy roots, meaning she is once again fun to watch. And the stewardesses were “Lady Mary” (Michelle Dockery, whose voice is so incredible you could happily listen to her read a phone book), and believe it or not, Lupita Nyong’o, the newly minted Oscar winner herself. Liam Neeson has a track record of picking scripts that are decent or better, and decent is all he really needs in order to shine and make the movie a ton of fun. How bad could Nonstop possibly be?

Really fucking bad, that’s how bad! So bad, I’m appalled that Liam Neeson agreed to be its star, and saddened that the other distinguished actresses mentioned would take nothing roles in order to participate in it. To say its story is idiotic does not fully capture it. There’s an evolving and deepening idiocy about this film, a chaining together and compounding of absurdities, stupidly manipulative contrivances, and cringe-inducing clichés. The film is terribly shot, the fight scenes are badly conceived and choreographed, and although Liam Neeson has the magical ability to make any line sound good, no matter how terrible it may be, his three co-stars are just drifting aimlessly through their roles, and the supporting and incidental acting is absolutely atrocious.

And to make matters even worse, I get the feeling this movie was funded by some ultra-right-wing nut-jobs, because it has a very weird and upsetting covert message which equates US citizens who question whether or not America’s various Middle East wars are making us safer, with actual terrorist who would blow up innocent people (and themselves) on airplanes. This part of the film was so badly written its hard to tell for sure what the filmmakers were trying to say, but I’m pretty sure that was the gist of it. To this, all I have to say is: shame on them!

I think Liam Neeson has a responsibility to his fans to not appear in shit like this. We all count on him to deliver a certain experience: exciting, interesting, well-written action-dramas where the warm, likable, middle-aged guy with the great voice, alone and under pressure, cathartically beats and shoots his way to vindication and justice. To appear in a slimy, abhorrent spectacle like Nonstop, which merely exploits his stardom in the most cynical way, as if his fans are simply a collection of tasteless morons who will happily watch him in anything, no matter how offensive or nonsensical, is a violation of trust. Frankly, I don’t understand how he (or any of his co-stars) could read this script and come to the conclusion that it was worth anything beyond being summarily dumped in the trash.

If you are a Liam Neeson fan, skip Nonstop; it’s not what you’re looking for.